DEBlog

This little piggy went...

From the July 18th issue of The Week:

"A diabetic Illinois woman is recovering in a hospital after her dog chewed off her big toe. Linda Floyd, 56, who suffers numbness in her extremities, says she dozed off in the afternoon with her 1-year-old miniature dachshund, Roscoe, snuggled at her feet, and awoke several hours later to find Roscoe gnawing on her foot. Floyd cried out, and her daughter ran into the room. 'I didn't think when I went in there I was going to see that,' said Elizabeth Floyd, 23. 'It's hard to take in when you walk in a room and there's a dog eating your mom.'"

Tags: diabetes, doggies, toes

The Democratic Convention may be *very* interesting

I'm very late in this, but I've apparently been reading out of sequence. From the June 20th issue of The Week magazine:

Bad week for:
Political protestors, after rumors spread that Denver authorities plan to control unruly demonstrators at this summer's Democratic National Convention by unleashing a new infrasound weapon that makes people poop in their pants. For security reasons, city officials will not confirm or deny they've acquired a 'crap cannon,' but say their crowd-control meaasures 'will comply with federal and city requirements.'

Okay, it's been debunked, unfortunately. See this wired.com article for much more information and a picture of a naked guy on a toilet.

Get me outta here!

From the 6-27-08 issue of Week magazine:

"Pennsylvania firefighters in biohazard suits had to use soap and a saw to remove a naked man stuck in a portapotty. Shannon Hunter, 31, was 'wedged in tight,' said Deputy Fire Commissioner Chris Miller, 'so we systematically had to cut pieces of the toilet away.' Asked to explain his predicament, Hunter would say only that he'd 'needed to use the bathroom' after having seven beers at a nearby bar. 'When I asked him why he was naked,' said Miller, 'he just shrugged his shoulders.'"

I wonder why the biohazard suits.

TwoDaLoo

This one deserves its own post: behold the TwoDaLoo, "the world's first toilet two people can use ... at the exact same time. It brings couples closer together and conserves our water supply all with one flush."

Great name....

Moist, but not yucky

Just reading one of my favorite periodicals. Here's a quote from page 28:

"'I need to know they're clean. It all starts with pumping it right. We don't leave the last little bit in there. When we're done, it's moist but not yucky. You can touch it.'"

Click through to see the source!

The scoop on poop

Eric the Blogless sends along word of this site, in which there is discussion of the toilet-sitting woman already mentioned here. But really, you should go give the site a look. It's rather...interesting: PoopReport.com. It has the tag line, "Your #1 source for your #2 business."

Tags: toilets, feces, PoopReport.com

Constipated in Kansas

Susan has just sent along this story which is, I think, the strangest thing I have ever heard. Go ahead and read it and see if you're not left staring at your computer screen dumbly.

Out of the myriad questions that occur I ask, what does one do all day? Read, I suppose.

Tags: Kansas, bizarre, toilet seats, bathroom

Throwing toilet paper at bears

Here's something of interest. Charmin has a site up celebrating its sponsorship of 20 public restrooms in NYC. (If you check out the celebrity bio, you'll find that actress Molly Shannon "inaugurated the stalls with the ceremonial 'first flush.'" What, one wonders, does it do for one's resumé to be featured on Charmin's toilet paper site?)

The site has toilet-paper-themed background music and a "flush-o-meter" where you can view the red state/blue state divide as it pertains to toilet paper.

More importantly, there's a toilet paper roll toss game. I defy anyone to beat my score of 465!

Tags: bears in woods, toilet paper, Charmin

McGruff the Crime Dog Nabs Ne'erdowell

With...his Feces of Justice!

It could have been worse....

From this week's The Week (print) magazine:

Bad week for:
David Leggat of Scotland, who spent four days trapped inside a men's bathroom. The bathroom, at a private club that had closed for the winter, was freezing cold, so Leggat, 55, kept himself alive by plunging his feet into a sink he filled with hot water. "The only thing I regret," Leggat said after he was found, "is not getting trapped behind the bar."

I don't know. The cold is bad, sure, and a tile floor wouldn't help much. But you got water and, importantly, you have toilets. I suppose it would be a little dull.

Tags: David Leggat